Every once in a while, I find myself staring at a blank wall.
It’s just sitting there, giving no indication of direction, no hint of meaning, no hidden answers. Often even the question isn’t there… or even the beginning of the question.
I solve problems. I answer questions. I fix things that are broken. I see patterns in things, and seeing those patterns allows me to see what needs to be done. A lot of my sense of who I am, of self, involves those things.
Sometimes, though, there’s just the blank wall to stare at. There is no pattern to see.
This isn’t just that I haven’t figured out which thing to do next, but truly have no idea even where to look. It all just looks blank.
I can solve nearly any computer related problem. I can solve most relationship problems. I can even figure out how to fix broken toys. Even when I’m staring at that blank wall, I can solve all of these things for other people.
Sometimes, though, when it comes to me, I find myself staring at a blank wall.
In my own life I don’t always know what to do, or even who to ask or where to look. It makes me want to look all the harder, but sometimes that is not the answer.
Sometimes you just have to admit the wall is blank… Sometimes you just have to accept that you don’t have the answer.
Sometimes now is a good time to start.
Oh, and if you recognize the feeling that I am talking about, here is one more thing for you… You are not alone.
Picture from Flickr.
April 26, 2011
Awesome post. Maybe because I feel I’ve been staring at a blank wall for a few months now myself. I stumbled on your post about life purpose (trying to force the questions, nevermind the answers) and glad I’ve read this one. Sometimes it’s helpful just to know you’re not alone:-)
June 6, 2012
Same thing happens to me, only it’s be accident. Then when I try to stare at the wall purposefully to solve a problem, I never can. Funny how that works,