Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, a day to show your significant other that you love them. Marketers, of course, love this, throwing one thing after another that you can buy in order to show your love.
Many of the best ways to show your love, though, actually cost very little. They are also not limited to Valentine’s Day… you can remind your significant other any day, in ways that mean more than money.
Being a husband, I think about how to remind my wife I love her from time to time. I have, for your use, put together a list of nine different ways to do so… I may at some point try to come up with things that would work in reverse (how to remind your husband you love him), but I don’t naturally think that way, so it takes more effort, and therefore more time.
Some of these do cost, but not much (well, the cost of one depends on how long you’ve been together… if it’s been long enough, it could get pricey)… and most of them cost only time and attention.
How To Remind Your Wife You Love Her
Give Her 1 Rose For Each Year You’ve Been Together
This is what I’m doing for my wife tomorrow (yes, she’s a subscriber, but she doesn’t read the articles the day they come out, so I’m safe)… unless you’ve been together a very long time, it’s relatively inexpensive, and it has significance beyond simply buying her flowers. You’re showing that you’ve been thinking about the relationship, and remembering the past, by taking the time to get one per year.
Read To Her
This won’t really work for all women… but my wife loves it (as do a few who are slightly jealous of her for it). You could try it out yourself, or try to find out something else that provides an opportunity for being close while still building memories that appeals to your wife specifically.
Frame (Or Re-Frame) An Older Photo
This works best if you can find a photo of something significant in your relationship… a wedding picture, the day you proposed, or some other time that has a special place in both of your memories. It doesn’t have to be that, though… anything that features you together will work.
Call Off Work
This is another option that has a cost, although for most it doesn’t have a direct monetary cost… and taking an entire day off work shows your wife a little bit of how much you value her, much more so than buying her chocolates or even a necklace. It lets her know that she is more important to you than anything else, enough so that you took a day away from everything else just to spend it with her.
Of course, if your wife works, too, this would have to be something you plan together… it wouldn’t do much good for you to do it and then have her gone all day while she’s working.
REALLY Look At Her And Tell Her How Much You Love Her
When you’re together long enough, you tend to grow accustomed to each other. That leads you to stop really appreciating each other so much, so that you look past them, not really seeing them, and even when you have time together, you don’t make use of it… quantity time instead of quality time.
If that’s the case for your relationship, taking the time to really see her and appreciate her can be very powerful… for both of you. It can remind you of how much she truly means to you, and if you are really looking at her, and really present, and you tell her how much you love her, she will notice… and most likely appreciate it.
Kiss Her In A Way That Shows Her What You Just Told Her
Another thing that tends to fall away as you’ve been together longer is those kisses where the rest of the world fades away, and all that is left is the two of you in one unending moment. Really looking at her, and being present, as mentioned above, provides a great opportunity to correct this mistake.
It also adds another level, showing her how much you love her, in a way that words haven’t the ability to express.
A lot of couples, especially ones where the wife needs reminding of the love they share, don’t touch nearly enough. Touching intentionally brings intimacy, no matter what parts of you are touching. It can be feet under the table, legs as you sit beside each other, or even lips while you kiss.
Touching intentionally makes a really big difference in a relationship, and should be something that you make a conscious effort to keep up, not something that is saved for special occasions… it should be more that the occasion reminds you if you have let it slide.
One of the best ways to intentionally touch is to hold hands. Skin on skin contact has more impact than clothing on clothing (ie your legs touching), and your fingers are exceptionally sensitive… making the impact that much greater. As long as you are both doing it because you want to, it tends to convert quantity time to quality time… bringing you closer together and reminding her that you love her.
Skip A Movie And Do Something That Gives You Slow, Quiet Time Together
I’ve written about this before (in fact, it’s my most popular article), but it bears repeating: if you want your relationship to be strong, close, and in general live up to its potential, you really need to have slow time together. Slow time is time when you are focusing only on each other, leaving the rest of the world behind. It’s being together, and fully aware of each other and the fact that your significant other loves you enough to dedicate time to you alone. It is, by definition, quality time… and of critical importance.
Movies and other things that involve focusing on something else makes it much harder to have this kind of time… it’s hard to focus on the person you’re with when something else constantly requires your attention, too. If you want good slow time, skip the movie on your next date.
Some of these ways are things that come naturally when a relationship is new, but that doesn’t make them less true or applicable… it just makes them take less conscious effort. They are all focused on making you closer, reminding your wife that you love her by increasing your intimacy.
If you have a close, intimate relationship your wife will have no doubt that she is loved… that love will be present around her the vast majority of the time. You will, essentially, be reminding her constantly, through action and not just words, of your love.
What better Valentine’s Day gift can you give?